3 more steps!

Its Wednesday. I feel like I've failed already. Monday and Tuesday were really bad days. Had some of those psychotic thoughts... namely "oh, I could take this baby through the door and bang his head of the door frame" . Argh! Where do these thoughts come from? I'm just tired of having them again. I didn't have any intrusive thoughts when my hubby was home for the holidays. I know I'm just over-stretched. The insurance hasn't come through yet with 6 hours of help. We still get just 2. I'm frustrated. I really do feel like I need the help. I need the respite.

My husband had a good point, its God, not the insurance company I need to lean on for help. And I'll be asking God to give me either the strength or the assistance to do this w/ the kids. I went for a massage this evening. She loosened up some of the areas that were tense and causing heart attack feeling like pains. She felt a rib pop back in. So, then I went to the chiropractor who pushed a few things back into place.

Oh, one thing I did for myself yesterday was practice speaking in an Irish Accent. I have an audition tomorrow. And also, I sent my resume to a film company that is having general auditions.

Oh, so, its actually not so bad. Thats 3 things! practicing the accent, booking the audition, sending resume to film company.

I'm not sure if I count massage as a step to a better me. I know it helps my body, so maybe. Hm. I'll have to think about that one.

Ten Thousand Steps to a Better Me

They say it takes doing something 10,000 times before you become an expert at it. So, Here we go. Step one. I'm going to write a blog to count the things I'm doing to be a better me. Be an EXPERT at being me. The best me I can be.

I just realized, I'm tired, I need to go to bed. There, that step wasn't hard. I need to get enough rest if I'm going to be my best me! Goodnight long road ahead! Baby steps.